Inner Rebel

Christina Miglino: The Art of Letting Go: Embracing Rest, Refinement, and Freedom

April 11, 2023 Season 1 Episode 3
Inner Rebel
Christina Miglino: The Art of Letting Go: Embracing Rest, Refinement, and Freedom
Show Notes Transcript

In this special bonus episode, join hosts Jess and Melissa as they sit down with Christina Miglino, the person who brought them together. Christina is an accomplished family constellations facilitator, shamanic guide, spiritual coach, and the visionary behind the Mystery School of Intuitive Intelligence and the ancestral healing program, Journey to the Great Mother. During this intimate conversation, Christina opens up about her challenging childhood experiences in a mental hospital, the journey of cultivating trust and resiliency through darkness, and the important lessons learned from her recent encounter with professional burnout. Throughout the discussion, they delve into the courage of listening to our bodies, the rebellion of rest, and the uncomfortable process of embracing the unknown.

Tune in for an engaging and poignant conversation that explores the beauty of simplicity, the power of authentic leadership, and the bravery it takes to honor ourselves throughout the many phases and challenges of life.

Topics discussed:

  • Childhood experiences in a mental hospital
  • Healing from deep-seated traumas and ego deaths
  • Lessons learned from professional burnout
  • The importance of listening to ourselves
  • Respecting our need for rest and self-care
  • Knowing when to let go
  • Embracing the unknown with courage 
  • The willingness to refine and rediscover ourselves
  • The value of authentic leadership
  • The interconnectedness of our world

Listen now and immerse yourself in this enriching episode that reminds us of our deep interconnectedness and the power of living authentically.  If you loved today’s episode, please share your favorite takeaways by screenshotting this episode and tagging us on Instagram! We also have a free monthly community call on the first Wednesday of every month, join here

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Podcast: Inner Rebel

Episode Title: Christina Final Clip 35 Min

Host(s): Jessica, Melissa

Guest(s): Christina


Jessica - 0:0:0
Welcome Rebels. This is Jessica Rose. I am here with my extraordinary co-host, Melissa Bach Knights. 

Christina - 0:0:7
Hello. I'm so excited. 

Jessica - 0:0:9
We have a very, very, very special guest today with us. Cause this is somebody who is important to both of us and someone that we could probably credit for this entire podcast because she introduced us to each other. <laugh> Christina Theo is a family constellations facilitator and spiritual coach for women. She was the founder of the Mystery School of Intuitive Intelligence and the Ancestral Healing program journey to the grandmother. As someone who has witnessed her teaching and facilitating in both of these programs, I was able to see behind the scenes a little bit because I actually got to work alongside Christina doing human design. Never in my life have I found myself in, I guess you could call it like a, a business or a work environment that was so founded in love and collaboration operating out of such deep integrity and intention. So I really mean it. I really mean that she is the real deal and she's also the host of the podcast collaborations with Spirits. And perhaps most of all, she is an incredible, incredible friend. I'm so happy that you're here and that we get to talk. And without further ado, I'd like to welcome Christina Miglino. Hi. Hi <laugh>. Hi <laugh>. 

Christina - 0:1:28
Oh, I, I don't know what to say, but just thank you <laugh>. Thank you both for having me and I am excited to see what, um, blossoms from this conversation. 

Jessica - 0:1:40
Well we are so happy to have you here. 

Christina - 0:1:42
As Jessica was talking, I'm like, let's just bring people on and be like, this is a Christina hour. We're just gonna shower her with 

Christina - 0:1:48
Love. The feeling is so mutual so we can have a love fest anytime. <laugh>, 

Jessica - 0:1:54
As Melissa and I were trying to plan, you know, our first few episodes, we wanted people who had a direct impact on our lives, who inspired us personally and you were the first name that came up and you've done that for both of us. So, 

Christina - 0:2:9
So happy. 

Jessica - 0:2:10
Who are you, Christina <laugh>. 

Christina - 0:2:14
This is almost comical that you're asking me this question right now because I'm in such a identity shift. Mm-hmm. <affirmative> in my life. I mean, who's anybody <laugh>? Um, okay. I'm just going to say what's coming in from a spiritual place. I think that I and you and all of us are a divine expression of the goddess. And I think that we're also very uniquely that. So we're all the same and we're all so different in these beautiful ways. I came into this world a highly, highly sensitive little girl and I'm still her and she has shown me how to be the most vulnerable and sensitive and that I think has been what's allowed me to be resilient and strong, if that makes sense. So I'm her and then I'm also this fierce, fierce woman who's sort of ready to call out the truth in any moment. And that can sometimes backfire, but that's sort of who I am. So I don't know, that's sort of my best answer. I could say a lot of things, but yeah. I'll, I'll say that for now. <laugh>, 

Jessica - 0:3:42
Can I follow up and ask about the environment that that little girl was growing up in and what the stories or narratives or beliefs that were around you at that time? 

Christina - 0:3:56
Yeah, yeah. I grew up Catholic and that's the first thing that comes to mind because I was so sensitive, it sort of allowed me to play in the more etheric realms because the world was so intense for me. So I felt a deep connection to God <laugh> and to prayer. That was like one of the few, if you wanna call it like a life preserver that I could hold onto because my life was very, uh, I think it was hard, it was tumultuous. I grew up in a family that really struggled with money. Two parents working, three little kids kind of always moving house or losing jobs. There's just so much constant change and upheaval. So for me, how did I deal with that? I did my best little people only have so many options in these situations. So prayer was a big thing for me. 

Christina - 0:4:54
But then also I got sick really young and so I was in and out of the hospital a lot and there was sort of a pivotal point when I was eight years old that I went into the hospital for months at a time with migraine headaches. There was a lot of tests and a lot of drugs tried and a lot of things happened. But the doctors didn't have any diagnosis. They didn't understand what was happening. So they put me in in a child psychiatric ward for about a month. Wow. Talk about, you know, we all have those traumas that almost like reroute us. Yeah. I'm writing a memoir right now, which I'll just freaking say it, I am writing a memoir right now. Like claim it. Let's claim it. I am writing it and I don't care if anyone reads it, but this is coming up a lot because when you take an eight year old away from her parents, I knew it was horrible within me. I had no words for it. But now I see of course studying lots of psychology and attachment theory in so many things. Now I'm like, oh, this literally rerouted my whole path. 

Jessica - 0:6:3
Can I pause you for one second and ask how on earth they made that leap? Were they thinking that you were making up that you had migraines or what made them go, oh, this is where she belongs. Yeah. Cause this seems crazy. 

Christina - 0:6:18
Well, yeah, so exactly. It's interesting that you just know that because western medicine is married to pathology, right? So if they don't find the disease, if they don't find the thing that they can physically see on a scan or an MRI or something to say this is what's wrong with you. By the way, they did find a brain tumor in my hypothalamus, by the way. Um, they also 

Jessica - 0:6:42
And was that beforehand? 

Christina - 0:6:44
That was before they put me in the psych ward. Yeah. They basically announced to my parents, we don't know if she's gonna live very long. She could live nine months, she could live nine years. There's basically like a 99% chance that this is gonna grow. I don't know what percent, don't quote me on that, but they were like, this is probably malignant because of the location in the center of my hypothalamus. It also probably was not causing migraines at this time. So it was just a can of worms. And my migraines would go on and on. I'd have them for like six days, seven days at a time. And they were excruciating. Like I couldn't function basically. But yes, they decided because they couldn't see specifically what was causing them, they decided that they would put me in the psychiatric ward. They told my parents were gonna work on pain management. And what they were doing is behavior modification therapy, which is what they do in psychiatric wards still, which is so archaic. It's insane to me. But they give you all these rules and it's a point system. So you have to abide by the rules to gain points and then if you don't, you lose points. Whoa, this is, this is blowing in 

Jessica - 0:8:1
My mind right now. <laugh>, there is so much here. I wanna unpack because, because what's striking me is that this foundational experience in your life is rooted on being disbelieved. 

Christina - 0:8:13
Oh, 1000%. Yeah. Yeah, 

Jessica - 0:8:15
Yeah. And also being in this environment where you just have to follow the rules and do what you know other people want you to do in order to survive. 

Christina - 0:8:26
Right. Well if you can imagine also at eight years old, kids are really smart. Your children know everything. Even if they can't verbalize it or put it into a context that you understand, they understand in a way their body absorbs it. What is also weird, like you're talking about all the layers of whoa, this is nuts. I remember one day waking up and deciding, oh, I can just play the game and pretend and mask myself. I mean, that's not the language I was using in my little head, but I can make it look like I'm okay in getting better and that's how I'm gonna get outta here. Hmm. Yeah. Right. 

Jessica - 0:9:15
And I can't imagine a circumstance more high stakes than this for an eight year old to be in. Can you speak a little bit to what it was like to be there at that age? 

Christina - 0:9:26
Well, again, it's funny because eight years old, I remember so much I can tell you because I've been writing these stories out, which has actually, it's been very difficult cuz I am finding the stories in my body and my body is in pain as I'm writing about it, if that makes sense. But one of the things that I have been writing about is I remember the first time my parents got to visit me and visiting hours. I know that they were few and far between. It was like one, maybe two days a week. And it was very specific hours. And I remember the first time my whole body was shaking. I was sobbing when they walked in because I remember thinking, I have to tell them all these things that are happening in here, what I've seen, how horrible it is. But I couldn't, I was so emotional from not being with them and feeling, please just get me out of here. 

Christina - 0:10:26
Take me home. I cannot be here. The people in charge of me basically said, if you don't stop crying, were taking your parents away. And I couldn't stop crying. My whole body was sobbing and I couldn't do it and I wanted to do it and I couldn't do it. <laugh>. And they took my parents away. Oh. And my parents were like, okay, we're like following the protocol and the damage of that moment. And I'm not blaming any one person for this. Oh, I've done a lot of work with this and with my parents since. But man, it was the worst thing that they could have done. And I just remember them taking points off my chart. I was like taking away my arms or legs. 

Melissa - 0:11:10
Yeah. I literally can't even fathom a child going through this at all. And I'm so curious because I know this is something that you cultivate in other women. You've used these key experiences in your life, healing others. What was the journey of reestablishing safety in your body? 

Christina - 0:11:31
Yeah, it's a really good question. Well, here's the couple things that I would say have been part of it. Part of the answer. One, I was dancing before I went into the hospital and then when I finally was able to function again at around 10, I went back. So dance movement, moving my body, learning my body has been I think a huge part of my integration back to life. And then the other thing I would say is I haven't had a life of ease. It's been more like a life of pretty consistent ego deaths and big traumas. Not that I've had every trauma, but just like some really big things. My first abusive boyfriend in my early twenties brought me to my first shamonic journey and my therapist that I saw to get out of that relationship. And that was the start of my own studying of shamonic practice and also energy medicine and Buddhist meditation. 

Christina - 0:12:42
And I was so adamant about healing myself. I just committed to years of practice and study and teachers, I don't know that I really had another choice if I wanted to be here because it was so painful inside of me that I was like, okay, I have to figure out how to be here. And I'm doing that again right now, which is just so funny. Cuz we get through these years and years and we think, okay, we're good. Aren't we good for a while <laugh>? Like, I didn't, I pay my dues, didn't I do the million hours and now I've mastered something and I can be onto the next thing? And I'll tell you right now, it is a process of deepening. It's just always deepening. And it is not a given that just because I did A, B and C or just because I'm a spiritual person or because I had such a hard childhood, now it's like, okay, I'm good. Right? It's like, no <laugh>, it's just different now. 

Christina - 0:13:39
We were connecting before just a little bit about the fact that you're in this season of life, we'll call it. And our response was, it's perfect because that's what we wanna show. We're never done. And I don't say that in a discouraging way, but if you're somebody that's drawn to a deeper purpose here and you desire to live in a more soulfully connected way to spirit, whatever resonates with you, then your work is never done. And there's always these reinventions of ourselves or deeper dives into self. 

Jessica - 0:14:16
We talked about you being disbelieved for the pain that you were in and learning very early on that you had to follow the rules in order to survive. And somehow you have still created this career in this life around being totally unique and different. And I'm wondering, when did you, if there was a moment of discovery, what was the moment of recognition in yourself that to be true to yourself, you would be walking this very different path? And how did you find the courage after living through everything that you had and all the beliefs and messaging? How did you unwire that for yourself? 

Christina - 0:15:2
I mean, it's many things. It's the alchemy, right? Of just my life. I always was trying to understand that period of my life when I was in the hospital of crazy memories from things that happened to me in there. And so I was always even as a teenager, like, why did that happen? What was that? But I often tell the story of Anana the goddess, the queen of the heavens, going down to the underworld, her sister's realm of hell, ESKA gals, the queen of the hell realms. And how she had to go through the seven gates and had to give something of herself at each gate in order to pass through. And I think a lot of the time about this, because my life was so underworld themed at such a young age that I always wondered, what the heck, what is this? And as I got older, even as I became a choreographer and an actor and doing these things that really, you know, huge part of my spirit is leaning back into those things now. 

Christina - 0:16:8
Because the creativity and the worlds you get to move through the cycles are so different in the art world than in the hustle, hustle, grind, running a business. But I just remember at one point having nothing, no money can barely afford food. I'm just like, God, what about the ease of just normal life? Like when does that happen? I remember, I do remember going in for that first session where I did my first journey. So basically a meditation to an inner guide, which in Shamonic work I would say is representative of your power. So I did this visualization with this woman. A friend had suggested her. I had always l been looking for a spiritual mentor. I remember that at the time. Like I just really want a spiritual mentor that's not a guru, not caught up in ego stuff, which is so big in spirituality, which is why I have a love hate relationship with that whole world. 

Christina - 0:17:9
It's like everything, right? But um, I was really deeply seeking that when I feel like I found that with this woman and her partner and they ran a school for spiritual training basically. I went there and after that day I literally walked out of her office fundamentally different. I felt more in my body. I felt like the world looked very different. She had even heard my story and she said, I think you should consider this work that I do. This woman I don't know is saying this to me. So it kind of took me down that path. 

Melissa - 0:17:44
I'm curious, what was the catalyst that had you realize that now was the, the time to start to, to write? 

Jessica - 0:17:52

Christina - 0:17:54
Let me tell you <laugh>, um, please do <laugh> for one. I would say if my life was different when I was young and I got to go to the college that I got into that I really wanted to go to, it would be for writing. Writing was a passion. And then I also knew that I would be in the arts. I didn't go there because the amount of money it costs per year was so unfathomable to me. But the thought of writing was always there. And I have been talking about writing a book the last couple years and I also, you know, have all the, the who are you to write a book? Why would you write? You don't have a degree in writing and still something is like, you gotta do this. So I find it really interesting that I am, I'm on sabbatical from my work right now. I think very burnt out, taxed mentally, emotionally and physically to that edge where I'm like, if I don't step back, something's gonna break down. Mm-hmm <affirmative>. Right? And I happen to start a somatic writing program two months before making this decision. And I don't think that's Yeah, right. What 

Christina - 0:19:9

Christina - 0:19:9
Accident. <laugh> weird. Right? So weird. Um, so strangely I have been able to tend to myself in ways that I never have before. One of the things I learned as a young person was how to take care of everybody else. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. So even in the hospitals, a perfect example of it wasn't about me anymore. It was about how can I tend to everyone else's feelings around me so I can get outta here. So I am back to if you know the tarot, the fool card or like the child brain, right? I'm back in that space right now where after stepping back from my work, I literally had a full body breakdown where I was like, and I wasn't pushing myself. I was like, you're gonna get outta bed. Good now you're gonna go brush your teeth. Okay, now you need to eat something. And I'm not kidding, it was painful to do anything. This is when you know you're burnt out. Start diagnosing yourself left and right. And really what you need to do is notice that you're highly sensitive in a wild world that expects way too much out of people. 

Melissa - 0:20:15
Hmm. There's your quote, 

Jessica - 0:20:16
We're here talking about what it means to rebel. Most people would not listen to themselves and to acc claim that time and space and be willing to reinvent yourself potentially or rediscover yourself along the way. Part of Egoing <laugh> is that we kind of give up what it's all supposed to look like. Yep. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. So we end up in these spaces where it's all a a mystery and we kind of go back to the beginning. We're not really at the beginning, but that's just as much a part of the process. 

Christina - 0:20:55
Yeah. I, a year and a half ago I knew I should stop. Mm-hmm. <affirmative> because it's hard to explain, you know, if you're in online coaching world, it's such a weird world. There's a lot of business coaches and just coaches in general. The coaching world is full of people that are like, just pivot. No, you're resilient. Just pivot. Spend the money, hire the help, do the new thing. So I very much did that for about a year and a half thinking, okay, something is gonna lock into alignment here. Basically for me, my work did really well through the pandemic and in it was this past year, 2022 that things stopped working. Like, okay, it stopped working. Well that's very entrepreneurial, right? We ride the way, we do the things, we pivot, we try things. I tried everything that I knew how to try. The interesting kind of sad, but also I have to trust it thing is that I finally, I paired everything back and I finally got the small mighty team, new team that I thought would be perfect to go into the next thing that the next incarnation of what we were creating. 

Christina - 0:22:10
And it was so ideal. And it was like for one month we started to talk about building this out this year and what it would look like. And I just woke up on the full moon in cancer the other day and I was like, no. Mm-hmm <affirmative>, 

Jessica - 0:22:27
One thing I know about you and what you teach is so much of what you teach is about integrating the feminine and your businesses because you were taking advice from people who are really successful and people who know what they're doing in a lot of ways. But it was built on a very different paradigm. It just doesn't seem energetically aligned to who you really are fundamentally. 

Christina - 0:22:54

Jessica - 0:22:55
So it makes sense to me on some level that the structure out of alignment had to dissolve. 

Christina - 0:23:0
Yeah, I think that's a part of it. I think that's a part of it. And I think there's something else happening right now too. It's like a soul level. The way I would describe it is like there's a contract that's up and I don't know if that's me as a healer. I don't know if it's the way I'm doing my work. It feels like it's fundamental, which is why I needed to actually really, I'm just really, really slowed down. I still have some clients, I'm still functioning as my business, but really stepped back like seeing if this is even what I wanna continue doing. And I've had to go through, let me tell you right now, days where I was like, what is happening? I'm 37 years old. Why would the thing that I have been working on for so long and mastering and really seeing incredible results in my clients with, why would that stop? Why would I stop? All I know is that the future is us having a lot of different careers. Oh, I don't know if we're in that anymore. Where it's like you have one thing you do your whole life. Right? So we'll see <laugh>, I don't know what's gonna come. 

Melissa - 0:24:15
Well and the beautiful thing about the trust that you are embodying in this process, especially in the paradigm we're talking about of these are the strategies and this is the thing. And you check your boxes and you, you move up and you build and you grow and you expand. And this is how it's supposed to go right? To deeply listen in the way that you're listening, to have the monstrous courage to pull back. And I know it's very uncomfortable to not know, but to know that you don't need to know the answers right now, but you're in the inquiry of, let's see where this goes. Because so often we need this plan, we need the answers. We need to know what steps, we need to know where it's headed. And so many people can freeze in that or they just keep going. Right? Because they just keep going. They don't even take the pause. What can you say to this operating at your life at such a deep level of trust 

Christina - 0:25:14
<laugh> That helps. I'm so glad that that's what your takeaway 

Christina - 0:25:19
Is. <laugh>, you're like, you trust anything <laugh>. 

Christina - 0:25:23
I mean I think that deep trust comes from the willingness to fall apart, to break apart. Like just to shatter, you know? Right. And I, it doesn't feel like trust in every moment. I mean I have thought about every thought you could imagine, like has God has the universe dropped me. Yeah. And that's my ego fighting for the identity, fighting for the life preserver. Who am I if this isn't it and why would you do this to me as if something is puppeteering me? Running my own business really gave me the experience of not making money, of making a lot of money, of having a team that worked really well together to having a big team that I was paying tons of money that wasn't working really well together. Like I have had a lot of the different experiences and I can tell you right now that making the more money wasn't necessarily the thing that really fed my soul. 

Christina - 0:26:23
And I think that so often we can't help. That's the, that is the structure, right? The structure is what you said Melissa. It's okay. You build it, you grow, you expand, you wanna get to a certain number so that it's just steady and more flowing and whatever all of that is, I don't wanna say a lie cuz some people do experience that. But I think it's much more nuanced and I think that life exists in the place no matter what amount of money you're making, it exists in the place that you feel free. Mm-hmm <affirmative> and more money for me never equaled more freedom for me personally. Maybe I could have gotten there, maybe I will get there. But pairing everything back at a time where I don't really have any money left. I used all the money in the business to try to pivot and make things work that weren't working. 

Christina - 0:27:14
And now at this place of just, I felt pretty clear that I wasn't gonna survive. I had to pull back to survive. Mm-hmm <affirmative>, none of that matters. Like what matters now is do I feel ease in my body? Do I feel like I'm taking care of myself? Like actually, cuz there's so much BS around like self-care and am I actually making art or writing or doing the things that feed me? I don't know. I think I was so outta balance giving that I had no concept of receiving. Even though that's so much of the foundation of what I was trying to share with women. Like we have to be able to receive. That's huge. 

Christina - 0:28:3

Christina - 0:28:4

Melissa - 0:28:4
Know that was the, the part of living what you teach. 

Christina - 0:28:7

Melissa - 0:28:8
Truly living what you teach. Right? That's what authentic leadership is, is like I'm on the freaking court with you. Yeah. And sometimes it's fucking messy. <laugh>. 

Jessica - 0:28:22
I often say in my human design readings that we are embodying the lessons and the gifts that we are here to give to the world and it starts with us. So those lessons start within us and that's what I see you doing. We tend to interpret things through this lens of right or wrong or good or bad when things don't go a particular way. But it's just what Belisa said, that you are becoming this true embodied example of what you preach. 

Christina - 0:28:53
Right? It's not just, am I passionate about it? It's like am I healthy? Am I making space for other things? Cause we love to say, just go out and do what you're passionate about and that'll show you everything. And it's like, yeah, but we can also go too far. Am I okay in this body right now? Am I taking care of myself? Am I tending to my relationships? Have I reached out to Jessica and Melissa recently? Am I doing the things that make life, everyday life worth living? 

Christina - 0:29:25
Because we can get really caught up. Especially if you're passionate about the work that you do. It is very easy <laugh> to get sucked in. Very easy. And it is nourishing, right? Cuz you're like, I'm doing the thing, like I've been training, this is meaningful. Look at the transformation. There's so much good happening. But then it's like mm-hmm <affirmative>. But how am I doing? How am I taking care of myself? How am I taking care of the things I care about? Am I sleeping? Am I nourishing my body? 

Jessica - 0:29:53
<laugh>? I think this is the work 

Christina - 0:29:55
<laugh>. So the work, 

Jessica - 0:29:56
What is the work? What is it that we actually have to do To me when I listen to you, it sounds like this process of refinement. Yeah. You know of constantly checking in with yourself. Am I aligned? Is this authentic to me? Does this feel right and true right now? You know, I'm exploring this in my body and constantly coming back to it and having the bravery and moments where you're like, actually this doesn't work anymore. Right. To know when to stop and to pivot or adjust or wait until something new comes. I think for most of us, we get caught up in the grind and the rhythm and this one idea that we have of what it's supposed to look like and we stop checking in. Yeah. 

Jessica - 0:30:42
And we stop being brave enough to sit in the pain and the darkness and the discomforts of what living authentically can actually require of us. Mm-hmm <affirmative>, they often say when I give a reading, the thing that people don't wanna do the most is the thing that will actually change their life. It's the simplest thing. Yeah. And <laugh>, it's simple, Brad Simple. But it's not simple because it means that everything will probably change and they actually have to start thinking about what makes them happy and what they really wanna do with their time and energy. And if you start to think about that the whole what we're talking about before, the whole structure falls, right. Because you realize everything that you actually built your life upon is not actually true. And if you wanna get back to authenticity, sometimes it all falls apart. And what does that mean? And that takes so much courage. You have so much courage and so 

Christina - 0:31:35
<laugh>. Yeah. I mean yes I can say I do <laugh>. I get that part is Yeah. Yeah. You know, also, I just wanna say it feels appropriate that the cosmic joke in all of this I think is that we somehow think that we're independent of each other and that our one idea or vision or passion or purpose is somehow not connected to the all. And I think that's where the ego can be such a struggle. Where now I think one of the beautiful things about structure falling apart and everything coming down to the fundamental back to basics thing is that I just really see that the janitor is as important as the president. Right? I am not how many women's lives I've touched, I exist as an important part of this deep interdependent relationship of the expression of the embodied goddess. No matter what we can all say, oh yeah, that's true. 

Christina - 0:32:43
That's true, that's true. But to embody that and to live it, to be walking my wolf pup on my land and be like this moment, if this is when I go, this is everything, this is perfect. If all I did is right mm-hmm <affirmative> in my little house and walk my dog and build my fire and pray and give thanks and whatever I do on my day to day, if that's all I did, that is a life well lived. But we are so good at being like, if I don't and if I can't and I'm gonna help 1 million people, what if you're helping people and you don't even know you're helping people? What if by taking my neighbor, I like making Italian pasta sauce cuz in my family it's like a thing we do. What if I take him my leftovers and he loves it and that changes his life because he's over here living in the middle of nowhere like me. And that's one of the primary interactions he's had in months. These things matter too. Mm-hmm. <affirmative> and putting any sort of hierarchy, this is better than this. It is the grand cosmic joke. If I don't make this much money, my stuff doesn't count as much. It's like that is such fundamental bullshit. I don't know if I'm allowed to swear on here, but I 

Christina - 0:34:5
Yeah, you can. You of course this is not 

Jessica - 0:34:7
Yes. Not 

Christina - 0:34:9
<laugh>. That would be funny. We're like, we are the rebels don't say fuck. 

Melissa - 0:34:13
Yeah we are the rebels. And these are the rules of who you get to be while you're eating 

Christina - 0:34:17

Christina - 0:34:19
God that hit home to me on so many levels. 

Jessica - 0:34:22
You are speaking to true freedom. That is the definition of freedom. Christina, the thank you. I know that it doesn't matter how many people's lives you touch, but you certainly have touched mine. Yes. In Melissa's. And I know that we are just in awe and so grateful and so proud of you. 

Christina - 0:34:43
Thank you. And I mean I truly, when I say the feeling is mutual with the two of you, it is so mutual and my life has been so transformed by both of you. And I can't even believe I get to say that cuz I, I really look to both of you like these are the women that I wanna be like these are the women that I wanna be like and surrounded by. And I am, I'm so grateful for both of you. I love you so much and, and now you're in each other's lives. It's so cool. 

Jessica - 0:35:16
Well, on that note, I know we have to wrap up, but I just think it speaks to also community and how important it is to find your people and how lucky I feel to, you know, cuz aligning with you brought in all these other women into my life who have been so, it's just such a gift to me and, and we can't do it alone. So thank you for being my people, you guys. 

Christina - 0:35:41
Yeah. And we've returned full circle to the love fest, <laugh> close things out. We're obsessed with each other. <laugh> truth. Yeah. And I don't wanna live any other way. So Love you both. 

Jessica - 0:35:54
Love you both much. Thank you.